So, this morning I got in some rushed devotions while the rest of the house was waking up. I have phases when I’m on top of my devotions and I get them done, and phases when I don’t. For some reason, I like them to be the first thing I do in the morning, as though they were setting the tone for the day. Getting them done in the afternoon when everyone’s got to bed again feels almost like cheating. It’s like sending a birthday card on someone’s birthday and knowing it’s better than nothing, but not good enough.
Part of the reason for this is I don’t want my wife to walk in on me. It’s not so much a feeling of shame that I’m worried about as it is that I know I’d suddenly feel ridiculous. She knows I have the altar there, she sees the offerings. But, she doesn’t really ask questions and I interpret that as a lack on interest.
Then, as my omen for the day, I got the Seven of Swords, reversed. I didn’t know what to make of that. The book spoke of manipulation and concealment, or returning to the scene of an incident. None of those made sense as a clue to my day, and I tried doing the two-power meditation and then re-focusing my thoughts on the omen.
Concealment! I was hiding what I was doing from my wife.
How should I fix that? I could just say I’m going to do my devotions, regardless of who’s in the room or not. But, that was a big step for me to take. After all, why make a commitment if you’re not sure you can follow though.
Then, literally only minutes later, when I was in the kitchen, getting the breakfast ready, she walked in and said “Did you already light and blow out a candle?” I guess she smelled it.
“Yeah.” I said. “As part of my prayers.”
“Every morning if I can.” And there it was, we had the conversation. I don’t know that the omen told me that was going to happen, but it did get me ready for it.
And for that, I’m grateful. Even more than the normal gratitude I try to have for every omen I’m given.