I’m not a lapsed pagan. I have allowed other things to push themselves into the forefront of my life, but I still try to make offerings to Brigid, I still honor the Earth Mother when I’m outside.

But, here’s the thing: I know I could do more. I know I want to do more.

Having grown up Christian, the feelin ghtat I could be doing more for my religion is a familiar one. The difference — and I think this is a good sign — is that I really wish I were getting more done. When I was still attending my parents’ church, I resented the intrusions religion made into my life.

I really think I’d like to begin exploring the Roman Pantheon.

I know I want to expand not only my experience of nature — one of my most moving recent experiences was testing myself to see how long I could crouch, silently, in the forest — but also my knowledge of it.

Even more, I’d like to focus on sacralizing my day-to-day. Either I have to bite the bullet and find rites I can perform in front of my kids, or I have to drag myself out of bed.

Here’s hoping that the next solar tide leaves me feeling reassured on all those fronts.


One thought on “An Odd Sign of Conviction

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